dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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