I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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