I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
