***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
