I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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