What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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