I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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