why didn't you poke me back
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize