I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
