So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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