: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
