just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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