I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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