shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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