I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
