...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize