He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
