No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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