soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
