laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
