great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
