I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
My life is pants optional.
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