I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
