i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
