I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
