Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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