I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize