ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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