he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
