Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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