somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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