its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
