I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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