i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
