So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize