Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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