Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
