And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
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but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
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Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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