Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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