I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Mom said you looked used
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
