I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.