Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.