VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
