you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
