that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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