why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize