There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
