Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
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