He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
