Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello

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(703): Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello http://tfl.nu/a1cc

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(210): View more from Texas

this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!

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(210): this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings! http://tfl.nu/x9r9

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.

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(617): I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation. http://tfl.nu/k6x3

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(347): View more from New York

k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza

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(347): k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza http://tfl.nu/rg2w

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(970): View more from Colorado

What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk

(1-970): View more from Colorado

That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!

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(970): What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk (1-970): That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at! http://tfl.nu/fm55

Replies (80) Good night (1000) Bad night (3713)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose

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(717): she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose http://tfl.nu/p9h0

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(904): View more from Florida

Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?

(1-904): View more from Florida

six.

(904): View more from Florida

Oh, I thought it was higher.

(1-904): View more from Florida

No, that would be the Matt's

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(904): Another one? Damn, how many David's is that? (1-904): six. (904): Oh, I thought it was higher. (1-904): No, that would be the Matt's http://tfl.nu/8llg

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(203): View more from Connecticut

You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.

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(203): You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly. http://tfl.nu/n1s3

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(937): View more from Ohio

i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.

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(937): i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage. http://tfl.nu/bqw6

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(989): View more from Michigan

ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.

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(989): ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore. http://tfl.nu/xzjn

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(201): View more from New Jersey

My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.

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(201): My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf. http://tfl.nu/v6hn

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(479): View more from Arkansas

I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!

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(479): I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning! http://tfl.nu/musz

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(250): View more from British Columbia

not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home

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(250): not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home http://tfl.nu/i7w6

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(970): View more from Colorado

I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.

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(970): I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome. http://tfl.nu/hol9

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(309): View more from Illinois

Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?

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(309): Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs? http://tfl.nu/hddn

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