Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table

  (804): View more from Virginia

  by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table (804): by asking you if you bought one for the apartment? http://tfl.nu/5ql8
  Replies (6) Good night (2677) Bad night (656)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  I thought Christmas was going to come before I did

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): I thought Christmas was going to come before I did http://tfl.nu/cili
  Replies (10) Good night (1200) Bad night (7138)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?

  (1-705): View more from Ontario

  I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk? (1-705): I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month. http://tfl.nu/0dv4
  Replies (14) Good night (3871) Bad night (923)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though.... http://tfl.nu/r2dr
  Replies (25) Good night (2885) Bad night (1798)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook http://tfl.nu/ft2u
  Replies (36) Good night (10445) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won. http://tfl.nu/w0xy
  Replies (90) Good night (7274) Bad night (1817)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life. http://tfl.nu/wwre
  Replies (3) Good night (3164) Bad night (1113)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler. http://tfl.nu/mskj
  Replies (6) Good night (2733) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  But you wear shame so well

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group (1-303): But you wear shame so well http://tfl.nu/l3oh
  Replies (4) Good night (2942) Bad night (798)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong? http://tfl.nu/dmf6
  Replies (7) Good night (1689) Bad night (742)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am? http://tfl.nu/gml1
  Replies (5) Good night (1121) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation. http://tfl.nu/xoud
  Replies (2) Good night (871) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme. http://tfl.nu/cq54
  Replies (0) Good night (614) Bad night (269)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids? http://tfl.nu/4q99
  Replies (4) Good night (695) Bad night (372)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why? http://tfl.nu/d284
  Replies (3) Good night (324) Bad night (427)

Randomize