Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time http://tfl.nu/rffr
  Replies (21) Good night (5798) Bad night (1266)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet http://tfl.nu/1ehg
  Replies (14) Good night (832) Bad night (3104)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that. http://tfl.nu/4x8y
  Replies (15) Good night (4148) Bad night (818)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date http://tfl.nu/ynms
  Replies (29) Good night (14550) Bad night (1274)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Why was I handcuffed to the roof?

  (518): View more from New York

  It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): Why was I handcuffed to the roof? (518): It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly http://tfl.nu/nk88
  Replies (27) Good night (9351) Bad night (1273)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin http://tfl.nu/ftsd
  Replies (3) Good night (3055) Bad night (1103)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking. http://tfl.nu/0mh2
  Replies (5) Good night (3506) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving. http://tfl.nu/oull
  Replies (26) Good night (7803) Bad night (1992)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40. http://tfl.nu/qfdq
  Replies (7) Good night (2407) Bad night (828)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks http://tfl.nu/tkbs
  Replies (6) Good night (1520) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame.. http://tfl.nu/q158
  Replies (3) Good night (1146) Bad night (569)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs. http://tfl.nu/vdej
  Replies (9) Good night (514) Bad night (1145)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful... http://tfl.nu/18jg
  Replies (3) Good night (1102) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown??? http://tfl.nu/ek0c
  Replies (3) Good night (697) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures. http://tfl.nu/2cky
  Replies (1) Good night (791) Bad night (313)

Randomize