Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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