In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I did not marry a roomba.
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