yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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